there has been a very steep learning curve in my life with depression.  for somebody like me, who really enjoys being teacher’s pet, it’s so nice to be able to look to experts for the answers and then regurgitate them without ever finding out if they are TRUE.

i’ve looked in so many places for help with my depression: talk therapy (helpful for a while), medication (helpful for a while), routine changes (helpful for a while), becoming a recluse (guess what i’m gonna say here?  that’s right…helpful for a while), becoming a party animal (yep, a while).  because depression is a multi-faceted disease, the best way to dance with it is also multi-dimensional.

but, the single most beneficial thing that has helped over  a long time is how i choose to nourish myself.

that’s right.  what i eat has become the greatest single factor in the severity of my depression.

and, the best way for me to eat is NOT what is usually recommended.

here’s how the logic usually went:  since sugar is a direct path to seratonin production, sugar makes us happy, so if you’re depressed eat sugar.  we don’t usually come right out and say sugar.  we say carbs.  generally whole grains.

i am so happy to see the tide turning.  there is a greater awareness that sugar is metabolized like a drug and we need more and more of it to get that initial hit.  even worse, after our sugar high, there is a pretty bad crash.  but, whole grains are still recommended as the foundation of a healthy diet.  (spoiler alert: they are incredibly detrimental.)

i rode this roller-coaster for a long time.  when i was on a “health kick” i would decrease my “sugar” intake but up by grain intake.  warm baguettes, bowlfuls of rice and beans, quinoa, quinoa, quinoa, mounds of pasta bolognese.  after each hit, i would feel a little euphoric, detached.  and then, BLAM.  i would want to increase my razor to wrist ratio.

when i don’t eat sugar, grains of any kind, and keep my protein/fat to carb ratio at least 2:1, i can feel the life in me instead of wishing for death.  and that’s pretty damn sweet.

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